Ready or not......

I'm ready but not ready at all!!  Where are the days going????  It seems that the last two weeks just blew by at warp speed, it should still be July!  Most people in the adoption world are counting down the days and can't wait, the wait is unbearable and taking forever.  Well, I have those feelings but I'M NOT READY!!!!!!  Why am I not ready? Haven't I had over a year to plan and prepare?  Why yes I did, I've had plenty of time.  But time is not what it was like as a kid waiting for Christmas morning. As a kid time took forever, It was almost like one day passing felt like 10.  As a adult I feel like I lose 10 days for every day passing.....I NEED MORE TIME!!!  Partly, having my kids home for summer vacation is not making things easy by any means.  Boom Boom needs structure and routine.  The last few weeks have been hell.  I was trying to accomplish too many things and left him to his own devices to entertain himself.  I paid heavily for the few stolen moments to make phone calls, clean house, fundraise, and shower.  Nothing worse that being in the shower and not knowing what I'm going to find.  Well Boom Boom learned last week how fun it is to pitch things over our upstairs balcony onto the living room below.  Clearing tables with a one arm sweep is also fun.  But his favorite is grabbing all his favorite foods out of the pantry and sending them flying throughout the kitchen.  Minutes, all he needs is a minute or two.  He's quite skilled and adept in his wreaking havoc.  So I took last week off.  I didn't clean, no laundry, hardly cooked, no blogging, no fundraising, and no phone chatting.  Instead we played legos galore, painted pictures, colored, went on walks, rode bikes, went to the park, and went out for ice cream.  It was awesome!!!!  I feel refreshed and my kids were happy.  But I lost a week.  I really can't afford to lose a week and am a bit panicked about it!

So what is this week going to bring?  Well Boom Boom has some therapy appointments and am hoping that will count in his book as an outing!  Potato Bug is easily pacified, I just need to provide access to paint, play dough, play sand, and me.  If he can be in my space, breathing my air he's good, he's happiest glued to my side.  With my two side kicks I'm going to shoot for multi tasking.  Hoping to pick up some items for our online auction and kick that off next week.  We also ordered bunk beds for Scholar and Potato Bug, hoping those show up this week.  Today I got the room painted, woo hoo!!!  That's a big one checked off my list!  PB wanted a orange and green room.  Um, had to talk him out of a pumpkin room so we settle on orange and gray.  He wants motorcycle pictures on the wall so I swayed him to Harley Davidson colors!  

Here's the little man helping out!!

I really wanted to have Boom Boom and Hoot's rooms painted as well but that may just have to wait. Hoot will be in our room when we get home so I've got some time there!!  And Boom Boom is just happy to have his stuffed Tigey, the room decor is secondary for him.  Phew, no pressure there!!  

If all goes as planned we could have approval to travel by the end of August or early September!!  That's 3-4 weeks.  I could be in China meeting my children for the first time in the next month!  But before I can get there I need to be ready.  Between now and then I have two weddings, my eldest and his family visiting, and packing to do.  Also waiting on my passport to show up, only slightly panicking.  PB's came quick but I'm still waiting on mine!! Small detail.  Also, Gamer and I were talking and made a rather scary and difficult decision.  He's not going to come to China this time.  I can't imagine him not coming but it makes sense in all honesty.  His mom is coming to care for Boom Boom while we were going to be gone but now can't come for the length of time we would need her.  My parents offered to help as well but he's a high need little dude and we worry that it's just too much.  Also, Gamer has no vacation.  It was a tough medical year with Boom Boom and he burned most of it.  We knew we were going to be short but not this short.  We just can't afford 3 weeks of no paycheck with our last pennies going towards travel expenses.  So I will be traveling solo with Potato Bug, Scholar, and Hoot.  2 out of 3 have limited mobility.  Anyone want to come to China with me????  It won't be a vacation but it's guaranteed to change your life and give you a once in a lifetime experience.  Of course you'd be gone for 2.5 weeks and it would cost you a chunk of change.  MOM, if you're reading this I'm hoping you'll volunteer!!!  If not, I got this.  I know I can do it.  I've been baby/kid taming since I was 12.  I'm not a newbie, I will survive and so will my kids.  We may spend a lot of time in our hotel, dinner may be what I can stuff in my bag from the breakfast buffet, and we may be in our own version of "The Amazing Race" as we navigate our way to trains and planes.  But I can wear one kid, one kid can walk fine, and one kid can walk at a slow pace.  We're good!!  Boys can also carry their own back packs and pull their carry ons.  And I'm sure with the spectacle that will be us people will take mercy and help us along!

So ready or not......HERE I COME!